Huh? Hm

Dear Queen of Parks

I am a young professional (male) working as a structural engineer just of _____ street. The flat looks great but was wondering how long it would take to get to ____ street from the flat?

Hope to hear from you soon.

___________

I mean, he has my postcode ... wouldn't his engineering skills help him operate an A-Z or Transport for London website, and figure it out himself?

As you'll gather, the search continues. Met another nice girl today but she said she had to think about it. In my experience, thinking about it is not good.

Seek and ye shall be confused

I am looking for freelance copywriting work. Browsing here and there, I come across the following:

'Great opportunity for Conceptual ATL and digital Copywriter You're probably already working in a switched on ATL /Digital agency.Must be able to create and inspire advertising campaigns, convert brands from one-dimensional product offerings into lifestyle choices. Able to encompasses a solid understanding of a brand's objectives and the ability to communicate these aims in a way that encourages ongoing consumer loyalty, be relevant and enticing. Send conceptual work samples or web links and an outline profile of why you're hot.'

I can't even understand that job, let alone apply for it. In fact the only part I understood was 'why you're hot'.

I feel like I'm searching for everything at the moment: jobs, flatmates ... Looking for a flatmate really is like dating. The ones you want don't want you, and vice versa. A woman came on Wed who liked it, after a long and thorough inspection, but she was just too prim and proper - it would have been like sharing with my maiden aunt. Then I had another woman who I thought seemed great, and I would have given it to her, but she wanted to 'see other places'. Sigh. Today yet another person came around and eventually revealed, after having a good look around for half an hour, that she wasn't ready to move anywhere until early April.

'Would the landlord mind not receiving rent for two weeks?' she asked innocently.

'Not at all,' I felt like saying. 'And he would also love to buy you some new shoes.'

This was a professional woman in her, I guess, early thirties. I boggle and I baffle. I am going to start questioning people a bit more closely before they come around. Wish me luck.

Turn left at Chicken Cottage

I am looking for a new flatmate. It is sad. C is departing for exotic climes (climbs?) and now I need a new friend to live with. I've been doing interviews. The pattern so far seems to be that people come, look around, stay an hour, tell me their life story, then say they'll think about it. Hm.

As part of my 'ideal flatmate' pitch, I have been giving people detailed directions from the tube, part of which is 'Turn left at Chicken Cottage'. CC being one of those KFC wannabe chicken franchises that infest London (my favourite is actually called Kilburn Fried Chicken). I gave this very direction on the phone at work today. When I got off, my colleage (also C) was laughing. I gathered, through her tears of mirth, that she felt Chicken Cottage was not the best landmark to mention. Well, what can you do? It's there. It's highly visible. I just hope my future flatmate doesn't end up spending too much time in there.